Do you ever wonder if you have low self-esteem? Or maybe you suspect you have issues with self-esteem and are wondering if that true. Today I’ll be giving you showing you the sneaky ways low self-esteem may be showing up in your life.

I’ve struggled with low self-esteem for many years of my life but I had no idea that I had issues with low self-esteem. The way my self-esteem showed up was in these small ways.  By people pleasing, not telling people what I wanted, letting people walk all over me, feeling afraid to speak up and say what I wanted or how I felt. I always felt like I was the victim to other people’s wants and demands. I never really felt like I was getting what I wanted out of life and my needs often felt ignored or unimportant.

Because of this need to please and this fear of the uncomfortable it led me to become very avoidant. Avoidant of confrontation, avoidant of anything uncomfortable, avoidant of speaking my mind for fear of upsetting other people. I avoided things that were emotionally difficult for me which led me to becoming very passive in life and in my relationships.

And this pattern led to years of depression and kind of just going with the flow. It wasn’t until years of these that I had had enough, and I had to really confront what was going on. I wanted more for myself, my relationships, and my overall quality of life. And it was then after talking to a therapist that I realized I had issues with low self-esteem.

I was confused because I projected this perfect person who was agreeable, I succeeded in school, met my goals with ease but internally my relationship with myself was terrible.

So if your in the same boat I was in years ago. Here are some examples of low self esteem to help you decide for yourself:

But first what is self esteem: Self-esteem is the internal feelings you have about yourself. It is your measure of how much you value and like yourself simply.

Some examples of low self esteem are:

Inability to express wants needs and desires

Not knowing or understanding your individual  wants needs and desires

Feelings unworthy of love and respect

Feeling unable to manage and overcome challenges

Issues setting limits and boundaries in relationships

Recurring negative internal dialogue

Constant internal criticism with regards to appearance, success, abilities, etc

Second guessing  your actions often

Questioning other’s perception of you often

Self-hatred-anger and frustration about who you are

Inability to forgive self for small mistakes

Feelings of worthlessness or inferiority

Recurrent people pleasing

Struggle with assertiveness, communication or social anxiety

Low drive to succeed and/or having little direction in life

Inability to trust own choices and opinions

Overthinking and worry

Afraid to take  on challenges

Over apologizing

Difficulty prioritizing your wants, needs and feelings

Avoiding confrontation

Difficulty making decisions

Difficulty taking constructive criticism and negative feedback. Make take things very personally

Difficulty saying no

This is not an exhaustive list but it is a start. As you can see low self-esteem can show up in many ways. Some very obvious, and some not.

Sometimes we may have low self-esteem or our feelings of low self-worth show up in these sneaky ways. When we project this perfect image, this person has it all together. Our representative is what I’ll all her we miss an opportunity to authenticity and showing others who we really are and what we really want. On the inside we may feel like victims, unworthy, unable, we feel less than and insecure. Low self-esteem doesn’t have to be a broadcast, a big show, obvious to everyone around us. It shows up most with the internal relationship we have with ourselves, who we believe we are, what we believe we are capable and what we believe we deserve. And because of these beliefs, it drives everything we do, feel and how we show up in these subtle ways.

Everything you do, every choice you make is a string of decisions that add to your destiny. If this is something that you struggle with, I would love to hop on a quick call with you to hear your story and your struggles. I would love to support you in creating the positive internal dialogue and bravery-driven steps that will change your destiny. And if you’re not ready for that take a look at how you show up in your life more authentically?

What has your relationship with yourself stopped you from doing? What does that internal voice tells you you aren’t capable of? Do you want to stop giving that voice so much power? And if so, what would be possible for you if you did? Comment is this was helpful.